As a little girl, I was known in my family for making countdowns...countdowns for everything. I would even make those paper chains and hang them in the doorways so that each day I could tear a link off. I made countdowns for Christmas, my birthday, until school ended, trips, etc etc etc. In fact, for Christmas, we also have this Christmas calendar in which there is a pin with a star that you have to move along each day and when you get to Christmas Eve you have to put it over the stable where Jesus was born. I was (and still am) the one that always moves that star -- when I was a girl I don't think I even gave others a chance to do it (as it was always the first thing I did in the morning after waking up), and now...I think they have simply given up on trying.
Now I bet you're all wondering, "Did Diane make a paper chain countdown in Chile?"...hahaha...ok, maybe you're not thinking that. A better question would be: Is Diane counting down the days until she leaves Chile? Is she counting down the days until she gets home?
Am I? Will I? ...honestly, I don't think I have a choice. This time around, I don't want to countdown...but so many people around me (either them being sad that I'm leaving) remind me and tell me..."Don't goooooo!!" and ask me, "When will be you be back?!?!"...or (being extremely happy and excited for me coming home) tell me..."Get ready for some football tackle size hugs!" and, "We really miss you back here!" And I don't hear this just once in a while...I think I get this everyday. So, let me tell you, it's hard. Today is May 21st, and coincidentally, it is around 9pm here in Chile, meaning that I will be in Chicago, IL, USA exactly two months from, well, now. Two months. (You can say that again.) Two months. Yeah. I said it. One side of me is soooooooo incredibly excited to see my family and friends back home...but the other side of me is sooooooo incredibly sad to leave my family and friends here in Chile.
It's interesting how our minds work. Last semester, when my American friends here had two months left, they were all very conscious of the date and time in general (as they were either ready to go home by then or trying to make the most of Chile the best they could). And then there was me...not even sure what day it was! And now...here I am...and I know exactly what day it is and how much time I have left. Crazy how our minds work...how our concept of time changes when we are expecting something to happen. Kind of like the car ride to the pool and how it always seemed to take soooo long to get there, but then the ride home seemed to go by so fast (especially when us kids would conk out as soon as we buckled our seat belt from swimming all day).
My birthday is June 20th...meaning that exactly one month from that date I will be getting on that plane--the one leaving this beautiful country. My mom did ask me to do her a favor though. She told me that I'm not allowed to be sad on my birthday. Wait, was that a favor? Or a command? (hahaha!) Oh well. So....that I will do. My birthday will be great! I just know it! That one will for sure be a blog post! hhaahaha!
Don't get me wrong, folks, even though I'm thinking about the time I have left here in Chile, I am at peace. Even though I actually know what the date is and what that means...it doesn't mean that I'm obsessed with it or anything. In fact, I very much recognize that time is, well, just time. And truth be said, there is a time for everything:
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
What do workers gain from their toil? I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him." Ecclesiastes 3:1-14
"He has made everything beautiful in its time...I know that everything God does will endure forever..." Wow. I know that I will have to leave Chile, and that it will be good, even knowing that it will be hard. Even though it makes me sad to think about leaving my loved ones here, I know that God continues being good...and that his time continues being perfect.
So peeps, two months. Time to live it up!!! Just like I've been doing for the first ten months I've been here!-- and I have the reason to do so now more than ever! The good news: I won't fall asleep on the way home like I did as a girl coming home from the pool...in fact, I'll be wide awake for the entiiiiiiire riiiide!!! yeah baby!!
This weekend:
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| FRAN!!! |
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| Las niñas from the girls' home!!! |
VIDEO with las niñas: CLICK HERE TO SEE SOME MAGIC!
^ Thanks to that video (and the time it took to download it), this blog became really long...but I hope you enjoyed it! hehehehe!
^ Thanks to that video (and the time it took to download it), this blog became really long...but I hope you enjoyed it! hehehehe!
Diane. I make chains. I'm the one who does the Advent calender thing in my house too. I have 203 days left in Chile (there's a countdown on my desktop). I'm already sad about having to go home and I still have plenty of time left. why are we the same person? I love it.
ReplyDeleteTienes mucha razón, los días y las horas pasan y nada podemos hacer para detener su avance. Pero en lo que sí somos plenamente libres es en la manera como vivimos cada día y cada momento, y la mejor forma es hacerlo en la sabiduría de Dios, en su propósito, en su revelación, en su palabra, en su bendición y en su amor. Centrados en el presente, y desde allí proyectar trazos derechos y profundos hacia el futuro, y tratar de corregir las consecuencias de los errores del pasado. Vivir cada día de tal manera que traigamos sabiduría al corazón, porque a fin y al cabo, toda la vida no es sino una cuenta regresiva.
ReplyDelete"Time to live it up!!"
ReplyDeleteAmen.
:)
Diane, I know it will be incredibly tough to leave...and at times you will feel depressed and insane (because you SHOULD be ecstatic to see your family/friends but you'll still be feeling sad...) but you will definitely make it through. One of the biggest, most helpful lessons God taught me through all my moving was to LIVE IN THE MOMENT. We need to trust Him with the past and the future, because all we can handle (with his help) is where we are right now. We need to trust Him to use us...whether we have one hour or 15 years in someone's life, it doesn't make a difference- we are helpless in impacting people positively unless He is involved. And our God is powerful enough, He can easily use 15 seconds of interaction to change someone's life. So, like we were talking about on Skype, we need to live where we are at. You're in Chile right now, so LIVE IT UP!! :) PARTAAAYYYYY!!! (in OUR kind of way...haha) Enjoy your friends, keep being involved, don't distance your self...and when the time comes to leave, God (and your family/friends here...and me) will be there for you.
Btw, that little girl to your left in the video...that's my kinda girl...oooh yeeeaaah....hahahaha
ReplyDeleteBekah, mi amor, I love you so much! and thank God so much for you!!!!!! thank you for your beautiful and very meaningful words! I LOVE YOU! (oh...and I have more videos of that girl that is so your kinda girl!! hahaha!!!)
ReplyDelete